Chasing Worthless Wind
by Miki8282
Summary: Sam, a teen who has struggled in life ever since his close friend Damon died saving his life. In his freshmen year of highschool, he meets a Chritian girl named Lucy who helps change his out look on life but ends up putting hers in danger due to his past.
1. Preface: Sam

Preface: Sam

I stayed there for what seemed like hours knelt over Damon's lifeless body. My jacket that I had used to stop the bleeding coming from his gunshot wound on his upper chest was covered in his blood. I didn't dare move it, hoping that somehow, he could still be alive under his pale skin. _He can't… he…_ My mind couldn't comprehend the thought of his death, ignoring his eyes that were looking to the end of the universe. He's been there my whole life. His death couldn't be possible. _He saved my life. _Tears rolled down my cheeks stinging the cuts the old man left on my face. That stupid old man that couldn't go a day without his precious drugs got what was coming for him. His body leaned halfway over a chair he broke when he fell. Damon shot him before he could attack me next, saving my life.

Poor Damon sat there in the cold, shivering and bleeding to death. When I tried to get up to get help, he grabbed my hand tightly and whispered to me, begging that I stay. For five minutes I said his name, telling him to let me go to get help and save him while he just stared at me like his own child. My voice bounced around in my head, my voice that was calling his name. His whispers that were hushed in my mind would forever be stuck in my memory. Five minutes after he was shot, his grip on me loosened, his eyes were no longer fixated on me but some other world I couldn't see, and his chest that moved when he was breathing was still.

"Damon," my heart spoke. My mind, which was telling me I need to leave to get someone, was no longer in control of my body. My mind only helped me get into this situation. I wasn't sure I could ever trust it again.

Fast paced foot steps came towards the direction of the old, run down house the druggie lived in. It was cold and dark, not the best place to be in the middle of winter in Maine. The sound of my cousin and his friends called for me and Damon. We had been missing for a few hours now. I looked back at Damon's body. "Damon," I moaned as I pushed my palms against his body, still in my own world where he's alive. "Damon, you gotta get up, man," I whined through the tears. When he didn't magically come back to life, I rolled my hands into fists and pounded the useless jacket that was still across his chest. I found myself not being able to breathe the freezing air that numbed my fingers while I choked. Strange noises came from my throat, noises I had never heard coming from me before because I hadn't remembered the last time I actually cried, and it sucks.

"Damon!" I couldn't stand it; the rusty smell of blood, how cold his hands were, the darkness in the room that traveled outside, and the moon that could be so miraculously bright in such a horrid moment. I hated everything around me in that moment. I hated how I was living and someone as innocent as Damon wasn't because of me.

"What the hell happened?" Tom said faintly. I hadn't even noticed he was there, but he was already well through the entrance of the death room and standing next me over the corpse. I had never liked Tom and he never liked me. He thought it was a waste of time for my cousin, John, to take care of me. And now, he had somewhat of a real reason to hate me.

When I didn't reply, he became impatient and kneeled down to me. He got uncomfortably close to my face. His breath was stained with smoke. "What did you do kid!" He grabbed the collar of my hood with both hands as he screamed in my face then pushed me back away from Damon's body. I could barely catch through the water in my eyes that he was checking for Damon's pulse and the look on his face when there wasn't one. I started to cry again, I tried not to but I had never been through any crap like this before. Once Tom heard my pain, he turned to me with a dangerously portentous look. "I'll ask one more time. What happened?" I attempted to regain my voice to speak again but it was like my throat was swelling up and I just couldn't. Tom came towards me and grabbed my hood by the collar again except he picked me up by it. "Grow up!" he yelled as he threw me to the ground. In fear, the tears stopped and so did the swelling.

"He stopped the guy from shooting me!" I yelled as I stumbled back on to me feet. It wasn't worded very well but my mind was foggy, I was cold, numb, and scared. There wasn't much I could do.

"Why did he have to stop him from shooting you?" Not only was it dark and hard to see him, but it was just hard to read his expression. I couldn't tell if he was my ally or enemy at this rate.

"The old man thought I was being noisy and I," I stuttered through the cold and the guilt that I couldn't cover. "I talked back at him when he threatened me." My words grew dimmer and dimmer as I admitted that I was being stupid and hazardous when I talked like that to a drunk with a gun.

Tom didn't like my answer. Watching him was like watching a man turn immortal. He was so still at first but it wasn't long before he hit me to the ground. He punched me twice in the stomach by the time John, Lance, Tony and Mason came along. Tony and Mason were just friends with my cousin. He probably got them to help look for Damon and I. Lance was Tom's younger brother and my best friend. He was somehow nicer than Tom which boggles my mind. The others were most likely already back at their own place. Our large group of friends would spend everyday in either John's or Damon's house. At the time, it was probably midnight. It was just us for now.

"Tom, stop it! Stop!" John yelled as he pulled Tom away from me, not noticing Damon or the old man in the dark.

"This stupid kid is the reason Damon got f**king killed!" I didn't blame Tom for hating me. After all, he was right. Damon's death was my fault and the bruises that were left on me after he punched me were well deserved and only a small part of what was coming.

John, who always was prepared for the worst of things, only took a couple seconds to take in Damon's death after Tom explained what I told him. I could tell, though, it was difficult for him to stay strong. "Tom, he's just a twelve year old. He couldn't have done anything," he defended me. For a while, they continued to rant on about what happened while I huddled in a corner, deploring my actions from earlier that day and watching my lifelong friends mourn over Damon. I lost one of my best friends over a few stupid, worthless words. Damon was the most considerate person in the world. If he could talk to me, I know he would say something about how saving my life was worth it, that I'm young and I have so much to look forward to. He was only a sophomore and so much of a better person than me. Why did he risk his life for a trouble making kid like me? I wasn't worth it! Tom and John finally shut up when the police came and answered as many questions as possible which wasn't many because they weren't there when the shooting actually happened. They asked me questions for about an hour and came to the conclusion that I wasn't guilty of anything and what happened was because a twelve year old was being a twelve year old and because a drunk man was being drunk. There was nothing to do except take the bodies away. Before they left, they told me I was lucky to have known Damon. I was. I really was.

About a week after everything settled down, Tom came by again. He gave me a few nasty looks then started yelling again, saying I was worthless and that I killed the person that brought us all together, that made us who we were. Tom started threatening to kill me then John told him to leave for good. A few of the others that were good friends with Tom agreed with him and left our friendship. When I went back to school, I noticed Lance had been ignoring me. I tried to talk to him one time. He cussed at me, punched me then got suspended for a week. The only time he ever talked to me after that was when our groups had encounters.

Tom had turned my best friend away from me. When he was being shoved out the door by John, his last words to me were, "_Someday, I'll make your life Hell!" _but he already had.


	2. Chapter 1 part 1: Lucy

Chapter 1: Lucy

_(three years later)_

So I'm back where I belong, in Burleigh, and not Swanchester. I suffered two years in that town that was full of rich and spoiled snobs and I had enough of them. People were awfully rude to me for no apparent reason but thankfully, it's different in Burleigh. I don't know why, but at Swanchester, people enjoyed my every day torture. After two years of praying, I'm finally out of the school filled with prissy, mall freaks.

It's been 3 days since school started and it's been pretty good so far, but the one thing I hate more than guys pretending to be someone else so that you like them are guys that stalk you. The first couple of days I was there and I had already noticed a lot of changes.

Guys actually liked me.

At Swanchester, well, no guy was ever interested in me. But, why would I want anyone interested in me from a place like that? If you haven't noticed, the name of the town is _Swanchester._ What kind of name for a town is that? You just know when you go there, there's going to be some cocky people. That place was filled with butts.

But, when I move on to high school, I straighten my hair a little, where a bit of eye liner and get clothes from Aeropostale, suddenly, it's like I'm a sketchy dude magnet. And I find it annoying. I don't even _like_ Aeropostale but I'm so freaking skinny, short and cheap that it's an easy place to shop in. I just have to look for the "XS" sticker and I'm good. Occasionally, I might actually go for the larger size of small.

Gasp.

Back to school anyways, there is this one kid that is seriously sketchy. I knew him from gym and simply asked him what we were doing that day and he's been following me since. He even went to Wal*Mart to buy cross necklaces because he knew how much I was a Christian. But that's not even the worst. Today, he told me he loved me through sign language.

Blah, I barf at desperate guys. They're pathetic.

There were some other guys that I could tell liked me but thankfully not as sketchy or clingy. But really, all I did was straighten my hair! Golly, I guess hair makes a big difference. But I didn't think that I would ever go out with anyone in that school. There aren't many people who believe in God and the ones that do never act like it.

I know what you people are thinking. It sounds kind of racist but I am extremely committed to my religion. My grand-mother married a "non-believer" in hopes that if he loved her enough, he would change for her or at least support her belief, but he didn't. Things didn't work out because she wanted to be the best Christian she could be. He ran off to Florida and avoided our whole family for years. I've only seen him once, apparently, but I can't remember it. I was too young. My mom has tried to stay in contact but he doesn't do his part.

I don't know all the details and I don't think I want to, but I just know that he's missing out. It's not like I don't _like_ people who don't believe in God, I just know that it wouldn't be worth dating them or anything.

And I don't date anyone either. I kind of avoid getting close to guys in that way because I'm afraid of what breaking up would be like. I guarantee you that the first guy I kiss will be the only one I do because I'm going to be careful about who I like. If I go out with a guy, it's because I have confidence that it would work out.

So, that's my plan. Don't waste my time and heart on a relationship that will only go… nowhere.

There is only one down to going to Burleigh if you're someone like me. There are a lot of rebels, at the least compared to most people in _Maine. _Burleigh is famous for bomb threats. One of the middle schools had 14 in three years. Half of them were just in one year.

There are also, apparently, some white kids here that want to be in gangs, thus, they are the gang wannabes. It's not a big deal, we don't hear much about them. Every now and then, there is just a fight in the hallways, by what I've heard. It should be interesting.

_(Two days ago)_

I awkwardly got into the bus on the first day of school and immediately saw my friend Julie. She kind of had a freak attack when she saw me, but it's okay because I did too. "Oh my gosh!" I said, "I can't believe it's you! It's been forever!"  
"I know! We haven't talked since you moved!" Julie flipped.

She moved over so that I could sit with her and we talked about what every person talks about when they haven't seen someone they know in a while. You know, the old, "Your hair is longer", "You're taller than me now," "What happened, you use to be adorable?" During the conversation I realized that in two years, you apparently grow and become uglier.

Julie's smile suddenly went away and was giving someone in the seat across from us a nasty look. "What is it, Sam?" she asked the mystery dude with a demanding tone.

"Uh," he stuttered as he tried to find an excuse for staring at us.

Julie became too impatient to wait for the reply so she began talking. I was still looking at this "Sam" dude. With his hood down and slumped in his seat, it made it extremely difficult to see him. It bugged me. The sun was bright too and shinning just so in my direction, blinding me and I couldn't see him, so I looked away, but he still answered Julie.

"Well, I was just wondering who your friend was? You don't have many _cool _ones that I know of," he said. Julie snarled at him and turned her head away in disgust.

_Cool? He assumes I'm cool just by looking at me? Is that a compliment?_ I wondered. I'm pretty sure I was blushing then. Hopefully the sun was so bright that no one could see it. I'm extremely pale with natural bleach blonde hair so when I become embarrassed, it's too noticeable.

The bus turned and the sun was finally out of my face and I could see him. The once black and grey blob formed into a muscular young man. I was shocked. Julie knew someone that wasn't insanely hideous? In fact he was kind of cute. He had black brown hair and eyes to match it. His square shaped face made me stare when he smiled. My eyes ran across his jaw line that was almost at a perpendicular angle with his neck. He had no freckles to ruin his smooth, light face. He was pale but like everyone else is in Maine. I could see a light tan just above his cheeks he probably received over the recent summer.

Hm. Cute.

"This is an old friend from sixth grade, Lucy. She went to Down Gate Middle School with us then left me to go Swanchester," Julie finally introduced me, scolding me about leaving her. I smiled alittle.

"Huh," he said lifting his head to examine me more. I turned away to give Julie some weird stare that she couldn't comprehend. I didn't even know what I was trying to tell her through my facial expressions besides the fact that I was stunned. "I don't remember you," he replied.

"I don't either," I lightly shook my head and pressed my lips together and tried to form a friendly smile. "And that's too bad for you because I'm pretty awesome," I turned to laugh with Julie who looked amused by the way I told that to Sam. I'm pretty sure he just rolled his eyes at me.

It was weird. Normally, my memory exceeds in its job. I would have thought I would recognize people at the least. He didn't look familiar at all.

"So why did you move away from Burleigh?" Julie asked, officially taking Sam out of the conversation.

"Because our house was being foreclosed and we couldn't get a new house here. We had to stay in our grand-parents old place, which just had to be in Swanchester. We bought it, but it didn't work out, I guess…" I paused, trying to remember everything that I didn't know, "I don't know the whole story, sooo, yea."

"Well, I'm glad you're back. Are you still a Jesus freak?" she smirked, her eyes beaming under her glasses, happy that I'm back.

I laughed, "Not as happy, but still, a stronger than ever Jesus freak, and proud of it." We laughed at ourselves and then the bus ride was over. We had arrived at Burleigh High School, home of the Rams.

We all stood up to exit the bus and when Sam got up, he towered over me. I looked up at him as if he was a skyscraper with wide eyes. Believe it or not, he didn't look as tall when he was sitting down. He looked down at me and chuckled at my flimsy reaction.

Face burning.

He gave me a hand signal to go out before him and Julie followed behind. Once I got out, I turned around to Julie who was waving to a few friends. Sam half smiled at us and walked by. I looked at Julie like I was star struck. "How do you know him?" I said in a bit of a farfetched way.

"Oh, I was forced against my will to work with him in class," she laughed. "He's a nice guy."

"I see." We started walking to the entrance. But I had to ask. "How tall is he?" I spoke quietly, leaning to her and not letting my eyes off Sam.

Julie snickered at me. "He's probably around 5"10', wouldn't be surprised if he's six feet now."

"That's really tall," I nodded in agreement.

"Not really, but then again, you're just short."

The whole school day was typical. I was a freshman, I got lost once or twice, I asked for help, juniors and seniors gave me wrong directions purposely, etc. I had a couple of classes with my old friends and one even invited me to a sleep over she had already set up for me when she heard I was coming back. Everyone in our small group of best friends would be there. I was glad to be welcomed back so warmly. If I ever went back to Swanchester, everyone there would cry then run away.

My last class of the day was science and I had Mr. Burke. He was on the old side, bald except for one ribbon of white hair that wrapped around the sides and back of his head. He had very thick glasses on too, the typical old Mainer. I was the second one to get class. My eyes searched for a random seat as I stepped in but then Mr. Burke told me it was arranged by alphabetical order. I didn't mind though because I had a lab table for a desk unlike the other righty desks. They aren't very comfortable for a lefty like me.

Then _he_ came into the classroom. I looked away. It was the third class I had with him! Why? He was in my French class, English and now science.

I pulled out a piece of paper that I got in English so that it looked like I had something to do and I pretended I didn't notice him. On the sheet was a list of questions. Mrs. Cyr my English teacher, gave, it to us to describe ourselves in typical ways. Things like, "Favorite color, show, food, sweets?" Then there were more deep questions that would take more time to fill out.

"Name?" Mr. Burke asked.

"Samuel Thompkins."

I smiled. What a last name.

"Okay… you sit right, over, there," he almost whispered to him.

Next thing I knew, he was sitting in the desk, in front and off to the side of mine. I looked up but quickly looked away. I noticed, though, that he was looking at me with some weird, teasingly pleased smile. I waited for him to talk. "You again," he mocked.

"Yup," was all I said. For a while he continued to sit in an awkward silence while he began to scan his eyes around the room, but then glanced over to my paper. I slowly noticed his attention and became irritated.

Great, another idiot that wouldn't leave me alone.

"May I help you?" I addressed him.

"Watch 'ya doing?" he lifted his upper body to get a better view of my paper.

"Something. Now could you leave me alone?" I shot back at him. He slumped down in his seat, trying to fuse together my innocent looks with my attitude.

"What's your problem?" he couldn't help but laugh. Apparently my innocence out-weighed my attitude.

"For the moment, _you_." I lashed out. His grin disappeared but he continued to look at me with this irritating expression. I figured I call it the, _"Look of Disapproval"._ Now I felt kind of bad, but I continued to try to focus on my sheet.

It didn't work. He was still glaring at me. "What are you, some kind of stalker?" I shrugged and shook my head at him.

His eyebrows rose up his forehead, stunned by my abrupt question. "Stalker?" He grinned and let out a snort. "_Stalker… _that's a new one," he glanced back at me, expecting a reply, but I went back to my paper. "Ha, well then, be that way." He folded his arms across his chest.

I sighed. "I'm sorry," I admitted when I really didn't need to.

"For what?" he said, baffled by my mood swing.

"For being a rude butt," I kept a straight face. He laughed at me, cocking his head back.

"Never heard that one before."

"Well, get use to it," I told him, "It's my number one insult."

(Just so you know, Burleigh and Swanchester do not exist in Maine, they are just random names. I wasn't sure if I could use real places because of the ways I addres them, so yea. And no, Swanchester is not Swanville. I totally did not think about that when I made up the name)


	3. Chapter 1 part 2: Sam

Chapter 1: Sam

There was a strong scent of smoke and beer as I came up to our "pod". A couple of the guys were out on the steps doing their thing, looking cool, and they were failing at it. It would really help if they shaved more than once every other day. "Hey, hey, Sammy!" Troy said, lifting his can up to greet me.

"Hey, Hoods, how was _school_?" Sean teased me but only because Troy dared to. They always made fun of me because I was the youngest one around.

He and his druggie buddies chuckled together as I walked by. I got some sweet revenge when I hit Sean's beer bottle. It fell and shattered as it hopped down the steps.

"Shit! Damn you, Hoods!" Troy yelled in his scratchy, torn up voice. I laughed and turned half way around to mock them. Sean and Troy continued to cuss over their wasted beer, obviously drunk as usual. The scary day would be when those two weren't caught drinking, sadly.

"Hoods, you back?" John yelled as I came through the door. He was fixing our broken sink, well, trying to. He's been working on it for a while but fails and we can't afford a mechanic.

He slid out from underneath the sink and greeted me with a strong smile. He flipped his somewhat long, black, hair and to the side so his eyes could greet mine. It was easy to see he had been out and about. His jeans were covered lightly in dry dirt and his white t-shirt didn't cover up his sweating very well, still strong and tanned as ever though.

John was like a big brother to me even though he was only my cousin. He took me in when my family died in a plane crash, including my 3 year old sister. Technically, he couldn't until he was old enough and able to support me. He worked hard for the day I finally moved in with him and finally became a closer part of him and his friends. He knew when my family died it hit me hard and has tried to keep me from going crazy, especially after Damon died. He's done an okay job I guess.

"How was school?" Now he was acting like a father and that's what bugged me.

"Uh, good. I guess." I looked at his firm face that sometimes scared me from under my hood and I could tell that wasn't a good enough answer. But as I continued to stay silent, he blew it off.

"So… make any friends that aren't druggies?" he asked as he looked back to the sink, hiding a smirk.

Weird enough as it was, that offended me quite a bit. "Come on, man. We live in Maine, get real," I complained.

"I know, I know," he sighed, facing me again, "Thanks to the others, though, they make life…" he stopped because he knew, by the look on my face, he wasn't driving in a good direction with that thought. He must have been out of it. He had been saying all the wrong things lately. It's probably just because he's worried about me going on to high school. A lot of our "enemies" are seniors or super seniors in that place.

"Whatever." I attempted to forget the haunting words Tom promised me that John almost brought up. I let my hands run through my scruffy black hair as I sighed and headed for the living room. It annoyed me when they talked about the _Others_. They blamed them for everything that has happened in the past few years even though they should blame me, but the guys avoid bringing that up. I guess they _have_ gotten out of control with all of their pranks but people like Tony keep on claiming they're sneaking in our place and stealing the beer. That's, however, Sean and Troy's fault.

I noticed it was oddly quiet. The dust covered, retro T.V. was off and not even the radio was on. No thumps or sounds of laughter and fighting were coming from upstairs and obviously no one dared to be in the kitchen while John was working on the sink. "Where's the rest of the guys?" I asked, picking up the T.V. remote.

"Uh," John mumbled as he was struggling to loosen something. "They said something about walking around downtown for a while." Of course they would. They're probably looking for trouble from the other group of losers.

"Idiots," I mumbled under my breath.

I sighed at our depressing, wrecked up house and old T.V. Heck, might as well sigh at my life too. I put my back pack down beside the couch, plumped myself down and tried to find something that I'd like on. I don't watch T.V. much because it's usually being hogged by the group.

After surfing for a little while, nothing on was good so I just kept it on a random channel and got up to get a snack.

The chips were open and had gone stale. The apples had been bruised by our wonderful, unwelcomed company. And everything else was just, unappealing. I really needed to get a job to help this place out.

I threw the bag of chips at the counter and because of my clumsiness and lack of any athletic knowledge I missed the top of the counter and hit the cubby under it instead. The bag fell and the crummy chips sprinkled out on to the floor. I sighed again, louder.

"Hey, calm down there Hoods," John grunted from under the sink.

"Would you quit calling me Hoods?" I fussed. They call me Hoods because I wear my hood all the time. I guess it wasn't a bad name, but I'm not the nick name type.

I didn't bother with the mess I made. I left the kitchen and went back to the living room with a bottle of soda and sat back down on the couch. I was about to enjoy at least a few minutes of this random show when the rest of the crew came in. They were screaming and hollering and hopped on the couch, claiming the T.V. too.

"Hey, be careful out there!" John screamed at them. They just blew him off as usual.

Hoorah, the wonderful company is back.

It didn't take long for me to get agitated, so grabbed my bag and got up to go to my room. It was the only place where I had a bit of privacy.

"Hoods, what's the matter?" Tony, who was just a little high, asked as he jumped up and down on the couch like a two year old.

"You, Tony," I answered, not turning around to bother see his reaction. It was followed by little, "Oh" and laughter.

"Ha ha, what a kid," He said. He liked me because I was the only one that was laid back and sane around here. Eh, I don't blame him. I'm pretty cool.

Tony was the "leader" of our group, I guess, besides the oldest, John. Tony was just the immature one. It used to be that, even as young as he was, Damon was the one that called when we did what, but then I ruined that. Now it was only John, Tony, Mason, Troy, Sean, Alex, Ted, Chance and I. The others left after I killed Damon.

John was the oldest and after that was Chance. They use to be good pals in high school but now, both are almost to their thirties and Chance is about ready to walk out on us, thanks to me. The only reason Chance didn't go on Tom's side was because John begged.

Next oldest were Ted and Alex. They both stay in the back-round of things with Chance. Neither of them like me much except for Ted who sometimes shows sympathy for me. He even talks to me every now and then, beginning to understand my situation more and more. Then Alex and Chance get to him again and goes mute around me for a while.

Tony was in the middle of us all, the age of twenty-four to be exact. And what a butthole he is. He actually almost left when Tom did too. It was understandable. Tom was like Tony's older brother. But five nights after Damon's death, Tony had to sleep at our place because he had nowhere else to go for a while and heard me sleep talking, or screaming. When I woke up, he was crying, bawling and told me sorry multiple times. I didn't know what to think when it happened and I still don't know what I said that broke his heart, but I watched him fall asleep, holding my hand, begging for me to forgive the way he treated me.

Thing was, I never noticed he was treating me like crap. I was only noticing Tom.

Sean and Troy, the twenty three year olds, were on my side from the start. They never liked Tom and celebrated when he was kicked out of our place. They encouraged me to stay strong throughout the last years of high school. After they graduated, they lost their ways and turned to drugs and getting high every day. They rely on John a lot but for some reason, he doesn't mind. He loves to help out with all his friends.

Finally, Mason is only twenty but could pass for and older, more mature dude. He's stayed back a few years, only due to the sudden shock of Damon's death which had affected his grades. Actually, when Damon died, almost every person in our group and in high school stayed back one or two years. John didn't let me fail though, he sometimes even did my homework for me when I was so out of it I looked dead.

Tony and the others continued to jump around the house, debating on what they all wanted to do next but before they all decided together as a group, Tony started to pull out a smaller ping pong table that can fit in our crowded living room. It was a good time to get out of the horror house.

The stairs creaked as I walked up to my small room. I didn't have much in it besides a bed, dresser, nightstand, and a desk. It was a little messy but spotless compared to downstairs. I fell on my bed and got in a comfortable position to go to sleep.

When I closed my eyes, I saw that girl again, Lucy. I had been thinking about her all day because I had seen her so much 'till I came back home. Also, I recognized her. I can't freaking figure out how or from where, though. It's not from school, at least it doesn't seem like it. I tried to find a connection with her and that but nothing came up. When I see her, this deep feeling that I can't explain comes to mind. Not what you would think, I promise. It's not like I'm falling in a deep love after the first day laying eyes upon her.

Please, leave that crap for Hollywood.

I try to satisfy myself by thinking, "I've probably seen her around," but there is still that missing puzzle piece in my mind I can't find a replacement for. I tried to start up conversations with her, but she basically shooed me away every time. I'm use to people trying to get me to talk but this time, it was the other way around.

And I didn't mind it, she seemed pretty cool. I wouldn't mind getting to know her. She was different in so many ways. The first thing I noticed was her hair that was naturally bright, bleach blonde and with a few caramel colored highlights. I couldn't stop staring at her unique, amazing features on the bus, the sun brightly beaming on her, bringing out her bright green eyes and pale, smooth skin. Dammit, she was just bright. And I had to laugh a little when she showed she was becoming uncomfortable.

Behind her pale skin, she blushed an awful lot too.

I don't like to look at some girl, though, and think, "She's hot," or "cute" or "ugly". I think it's pretty shallow to do that. And besides the way she looks, her personality is different too. She's pretty casual and it's annoying. I can tell she doesn't trust guys in general. She constantly accused me of stalking her when I didn't really have to try.

Then reality hit me, that this type of thing is stupid. I don't believe in, "love at first sight". It's a stupid story pretty, Richie Riches in Hollywood say to make their love seem more tangible. It's called lust, people, just admit it. Eventually it might be true love, but at first, it would be lust. And what I'm talking about is not that. Sure, she's cute… okay, so _very_ cute, but she's on my mind because she's just different and unique and because I feel like I know her from somewhere. Anyways, who said I even like her? The only reason I was thinking about her was because she was annoying me.

The thumping and cheering downstairs distracted my thoughts. It must have been beer pong time.

I guess I had to admit it, that I was _interested_ in her. _Maybe, for now,_ I thought, _I should just try not to be socially awkward and get to know her. I mean, we are probably complete opposites. _I mean, that was about as true as it could get. She has bright hair, I have dark hair. She wears clothes from prissy stores in the mall, I wear the hand-me-downs from friends and family. _I'll get to know her first then decide if I actually like her or not._

I shouldn't, either way. It's dangerous with the position I am. _Just friends._

Anyways, why would she like me? If she saw where I lived, who I partially lived with and got to know me, she'd probably run away screaming and never talk to me again, not that she basically has, already. I needed to remember, it takes two to tango. I would probably be single for the rest of my life anyways, utterly sad and single. I would be stuck in this dump too. I would probably eventually become a gangster wannabe while I'm at it and a pathetic one because I'm white.

What the heck am I thinking? So far she sounds like she hates me and now I'm complaining about being single! Why am I still thinking about this?

I sat up and rubbed my forehead. "Come on, dude. Just a girl," I tried to convince myself. There was more thumping and the sound of glass shattering. "I'm gonna kill you…" and John said more violent things after. I needed to get out. It isn't a good place to think.

I quickly skipped out the door and no one noticed because they were debating if Tony had cheated playing beer pong or not. How the frig is that possible? But, I didn't tell John I was leaving either. He would get mad at me later but I didn't care. I really didn't want to bother with anyone, or questions. I just wanted some "me" time.

I walked down to the Waterhall Street School elementary park, where Kindergarten through third graders went to. I went there as a kid and it's just a good place to go to get away. Every now and then some kids come along and they aren't the shy ones too. Sometimes they come up to me and want me to be part of their game. I usually think why not? Might as well enjoy being young. The parents are the ones that aren't too sure, but once they see how good I am with kids, they laugh along with us. Sometimes, I even get a thank-you from the parents when they leave.

Everyone expects me to be like the rest of my peers but I'm nothing like them and would never want to be. I actually have plans for the future that isn't based on drugs or messing with the _Others_. I have a life, or I want one. _If I really want a life, I should learn to be more social_, I thought. The only people that I really talked to at school were the people that were part of our "group". Most of them are super seniors, believe it or not, and I don't really like the ones that are my age, I'm just stuck with them.

And everyone at school can only think of what happened a while back, Damon's death. They always want to know and just once I become close to someone, just a little, they start asking a ton of questions. Apparently, I tend to look depressed too. A lot of people ask me if I'm okay and that's the most irritating question I get. The only people I enjoy talking to are John and Tony.

No kids were there at the time so I grabbed a swing and rocked myself a little before I was distracted again by noise. I looked up and a couple of older girls were across the field at the Burleigh elementary park, the elementary school for 4th and 5th graders (The schools are close together, there's only a field to separate them). They were screaming and laughing as they went through the whole playground. They probably went to the school before years ago.

I looked down awkwardly once I noticed they had all calmed down a bit. They huddled together in a small circle, almost all of them facing me at the same time. I tried to ignore them and continued rocking myself lightly on the swing but I looked up again to see one person pointing at me. As I looked a bit closer, the girls looked familiar, probably ones that go to my school. They must have recognized me and decided I was a good gossip topic. But there was only one that really caught my sight. My eyes focused on one, bright, bleach blonde haired girl talking amongst the others.

Of course it's her. Why wouldn't it be? The universe would, apparently, be invalid if it wasn't.


	4. Chapter 2: Lucy

Chapter 2, Lucy

"Is that him?" Tiffany asked.

"I don't know, it could be anyone," Michelle replied.

Some friends and I (my best friends back from 5th and 6th grade) decided to take a visit back to the old days. We were sleeping over at Brittany's house and it didn't take long to get bored, so we quickly went to the Burleigh Elementary School Park that happened to be only a street down from her place. It's _also _where we use to go to school and first became friends.

Across the field was the other elementary school, Water Hall Street School, and so was Sam, apparently. I couldn't tell because, believe it or not, I don't stalk people or stare at them enough to recognize their face from a hundred feet away. What I also couldn't tell was why everyone was freaking out about him so much.

"What's so special about him, guys?" I finally asked.

Michelle was of course the one to answer. She was a gossip girl, no doubt. In fifth grade, she gave away my secret crush by asking the guy out for me in front of a gossip _boy._ Together, they made the perfect rumor team.

"He's just a big mystery to everyone, ever since 6th grade. Plus, he is _pretty_ hot," she explained with a smirk while fixing her dirty blond, waist length hair into a pony tail. Michelle was never the type to worry much about the way she looked. On the other hand, she was always so proud of how long her hair was. But it was unbelievably unmanageable. She was the tallest one out of our group too, always has been and always will be.

Okay, I had to give in. Sam wasn't too bad looking but he wasn't _gorgeous_ either. He was definitely cuter than most other guys. I still didn't understand why he was so amazing. I actually found him to just be like every other stupid guy. Desperate. The way he tried to get me to talk all day bugged me off to no end.

"I have Civics with him!" Kaitlyn said as if she was "all that", locking her hips to the side. I snorted at her. She had always been the prettiest, more popular of us all, causing her to be cocky sometimes. She had the typical "mainiac" features; long, brown, wavy hair, dark hazel eyes and a medium tone for skin. She was a perfect average height of five feet and five inches with long, skinny legs and practically a perfect figure to go with her sweet, cubby cheek smile and heart shaped face.

"Well, Lucy and I have French with him." Brittany said, wrapping her arm around me. She fluttered her long, mascara covered eyelashes at everyone that hid her light brown eyes. (She wears way too much makeup) She smiled shyly as she tugged both me and her to gawk in Sam's direction, her curly brown hair bouncing on her shoulders. She let out the "crush" sigh. I rolled my eyes, removing her arm off of me. Everyone laughed at us.

"That's not all," I had to continue, trying to hide my grin. "While I share one of the most _romantic_ languages with him," I bragged as I swirled around a pole connected to the swing-set, letting my layered, bleach blonde hair shine in the sun and wave through the breeze, "I also have English and science with him, and don't forget about the bus," I added. Then I plopped myself on the woodchip covered ground and they did the same with wide grins crossing their faces.

"Wow," Tiffany started, "You could actually be one of the first peoples to become friends with him outside of his gang," she said casually smiling. I paused a little at the word she used. _Gang?_ Highly unlikely. I put the thought off.

Tiffany also had natural, bleach blonde hair like mine except hers was thinner and longer. She was usually red or pink, easily getting sunburns or snow-burns due to her sensitive skin. Her fashion choice wasn't always favorable but she dressed comfortably every day. She also was insanely smart and probably the most reasonable person around here.

"Maybe more than that…" Kaitlyn laughed, liking the idea of me and Sam. I immediately started shaking my head in rejection saying that it would never happen multiple times.

"Aw, but it would be cute!" Michelle agreed. She would get that rumor around the school in a heartbeat.

"I'll hurt you so bad," I gnarred out with quite the threat. But when I saw they weren't getting any more serious than they already were (which wasn't much), I sighed. "Come on, guys, let's not make a big deal about this. It's just a stupid guy that I don't know anything about, and besides," I looked to the sky, trying to make up some excuse when I noticed their unsatisfied with me looks, "he's too tall for me."

They all laughed at my cheap rationalization. I didn't dare complain too much about the fact that they were annoying me. I didn't want to ruin my good friendships when I just came back, but I thought they were acting awfully childish and adolescent. I guess you could say I was becoming a little paranoid of losing their friendship, but Swanchester taught me that they can be important in some situations.

This type of talk is something that I would have enjoyed a long time ago, but not anymore, not at this age. Maybe I've changed a little. When I came back to Burleigh, I was hoping that gossip would end, that I could move on, but here I am, stalking a guy I don't know with my friends. They were right though, he is a mystery. I considered him, though, just another sketchy dude.

And how dare I even think that high school would have less drama and gossip! Next thing I'll expect from the world is Justin Bieber going through puberty before the age of sixteen. I mean, come on! We all know that isn't going to happen. (Sorry Beliebers)

_Oh no. Oh crap,_ I thought as my dozed off eyes recognized fast movement, bringing me out of my deeper thoughts. Out of the blue, my friends all got up snickering at each other to go and see if it's Sam and sprinted towards the field. My body became hot as my nose flared and teeth grinded in fuming aggravation.

I didn't follow after them at first but then they started taunting and waving me to come along. _What the heck, _something told me, _just go and have fun. _I caved and started running across the field too, laughing again. The closer we got to Sam, the more I recognized him, and the more I got butterflies.

And I thought I didn't like him.

I slowed down a bit because of the nervousness and I also didn't want to look like crap when I was done running. The other girls got the message and joined me in slowing down. We were silent as we walked by Sam. I noticed, in the corner of my eye, him lifting his head up so that he could see us.

"So, _Lucy_," Michelle started loudly as we approached the jungle gym. This would not be good. "Who do you have for _English_?"

"Um," By how much Michelle exaggerated what she said, I could tell they were trying to get Sam to recognize or notice me. My word, they were so stupid, but I played along. "I have Mrs. Cyr."

"Oh? You do?" Now it was Brittany's turn. We climbed up some small, plastic stairs and sat down in some weird, circle type form in the center of munchkin land. "Well me too! What _mods_ do you have her?" She cocked her head sideways as she fluffed her auburn colored hair.

I risked a quick glance at Sam. There was no sign of him paying attention to us. I sighed. "I have hi- her… um, mods, uh, 11-12."

"Well that is cool, now isn't it, _Lucy?_" Tiffany added with a grin, her cheeks turning bright pink.

I mouthed to them to shut the heck up. This was annoying and they were only making us look foolish. So, I needed to end this. Sam was showing no sign of watching or listening to us and in a way, it almost felt like rejection. The thought that he had no reaction to hearing my name was, depressing. I know I shouldn't because I don't even know him and I apparently don't like him but it still kind of hurt.

"Um, Brittany, it's getting late. We should head back to your house." We all looked at each other in disappointment except for me who was a bit furious. They all knew it was true and agreed with a couple of nods and got up to head back.

Sam looked as if he had not moved at all from when we first saw him. We silently began to walk away from the jungle gym and were about to pass him when the strangest thing happened.

"Uh, excuse me?" an unfamiliar voice said quietly. We all looked in Sam's direction and I did not have to look at the girls faces to know that they were in shock. Sam put his hood down. The first thing I noticed was his somewhat short, black, shoveled hair. It was so thick and dark with a little bit of a wave and the orange sunset gave off a shiny, golden color in some spots on his smooth hair.

We were all silent for a while. I guess Sam was expecting some type of reply. When he realized it wasn't coming, he continued, taking a deep sigh and rubbed the back of his neck, preparing to speak. "Uh, I didn't mean to overhear, but I heard that one of you has Mrs. Cyr 11-12?"

My eyes widened without warning. I could feel my face turning red and the blood in my body begin to boil. I opened my mouth but all that came out was a short stutter.

I was not thinking_, Daww! How sweet that he pretended he didn't recognize me! _I thought, _What a pathetic move to pretend he didn't recognize me. And corny, very corny. _

"Um, Lucy, we will let you guys talk. We'll just be across the field." Someone said but I was in too much off a shock to match the voice with a face or name. I just heard footsteps trotting away. I tried to make up for my blankness by looking back at the others, but I quickly turned back to Sam.

Why was I even surprised? Earlier when he talked to me, I thought of it as nothing. Well, shoot. The girls got to my head, making a big deal over him.

It was quiet for a couple seconds but I didn't let it last long. "How cute." I sarcastically said with a nasty attitude.

He widened his dark browns eyes in guilty confusion, "What?"

"Pretending not to know me after our intense conversation in science," I said with smirk.

"Oh," he paused and a smile slowly formed on his face, "Yeah, well, your friend's little plan to get me to talk was pretty cute too." He half smiled at me.

"Ah, so you did notice." I laughed awkwardly in embarrassment, my cheeks burning again so much I lost my balance a little. I think it was the first time I actually laughed _with_ him. "Well, I promise, I had nothing to do with it." I defended myself.

He laughed too. "It's okay, I believe you." He was obviously holding something in. Nope, he did not believe me. Well, he should have because it was true. "Anyways," he continued again, "What was the homework she gave us?"

"She told us like three times," I criticized his attentive skills

"Well I didn't hear." He replied shaking his head lightly at me. I figured he was just trying to drag out the conversation. I tried my best to ignore the flirty thought.

"You aren't the school type, are you?"

"Nope. So what was it?"

I sighed, annoyed. "We just have to make a stupid list about _ourselves_. She gave us a sheet with questions to answer."

"Oh, right." He paused for a sec, "That _is_ really stupid, how old does she think we are?"

I laughed. It was true, Mrs. Cyr was insanely nice, but she did seem to be treating us younger than we were.

"All righty then," I said as I got up with a bit more confidence than before. "My friends are waiting sooo, see you tomorrow!" I nodded and waved good-bye as I walked off.

"Yeah, yeah, 'kay," he said, not ready for my abrupt exit, also getting up from the swing. I turned around for just a second and watched him walk away from the playground with his hands in his pockets. Back towards the school were my impatient, giggling friends who were already off the monkey bars standing in agony, waiting to hear what Sam and I talked about. I began to laugh and trotted towards them.

Oh, so many questions I'd have to answer and details I'd have to give_ all_ night.

At the sleepover, I explained every word I could possibly remember and every detail they wanted to hear from the conversation between me and Sam which wasn't much, but they made it seem like a lot. Then I had to explain it again when Carly came over late.

Carly and I slowly became friends when Michelle invited us over to her parties. She was girly too and probably Michelle's best friend. She wore a lot of makeup and straightened her hair every day but made it look good too. She actually looked a lot like Kaitlyn, having the same features except for her square shaped face.

I kind of found them all annoying throughout the night. All they wanted to do was gossip. So, as usual at our sleepovers, we all split up into groups. As usual, Tiffany and I went hiding in the closet… and if you thought of that in the wrong way, you have tested positive for being a pervert. Don't worry, we would go to talk about things that actually made since while Michelle and Carly went to the kitchen to gossip and Brittany and Kaitlyn went to play Wii.

Brittany's closet was big. There was, of course, clothes and shoes yet still enough room for a lamp and two chairs. It was quite cozy. I plopped down in a chair in relief and sighed. "Man, can they be annoying."

"I know. All they want to do is talk about guys." She exhaled and stretched her arms over her head at the relief of silence, praising it for a few moments. "Sorry to tell you but, many people will probably here about you and Sam shortly, knowing them." Ugh. I knew she was right.

"Yea, I wouldn't be surprised, but I have nothing to hide because Sam and I hardly know each other. I mean, come on? It's the first day and just because I had a few conversations, I…" crap, I stuttered, a sign of weakness, "_they_ are making a big deal out of it!" I collapsed. She shrugged as a reply but then squinted her eyes just a little.

"You've had a _few_ conversations?" Oh… she caught me.

I took a deep breath while I found some good, reasonable answer. "Well… yeah, we talked a little on the bus and in science and..."

She smiled diabolically at me. "No, see, right now, I think you're the one over exaggerating everything between you and him."

I grimaced at her. "I don't like the guy, okay? I've known him for one day and _you_ guys think we are meant to be!"

"Only because you guys would make a cute couple," she scarcely mumbled, afraid I might blow again.

"Ahem," I said, raising my chin and folding my hands together. "Look at all of the differences," I said in a mature voice like a professor, "He is tall, I am short. He has black hair, I have almost white hair. He is buff, I am skinny,"

"With curves," she interrupted with a smile, encouraging me. I couldn't help but laugh a little. "Look," Tiffany looked upon me seriously, "You are only looking at his _looks_. You're better than that!" she raised her arms in my direction.

I breathed in irritation.

"You think that because he is hot, he automatically isn't your type. You're good at not judging people if they have some physical flaws but when it comes to the "pretty" people," she quoted with her fingers, "you're the most judgmental person I've met. You automatically think they're your enemy."

Oh my word, she should replace Doctor Phil. She was beyond right, it wasn't even funny. It's true that I tend to look at the people who seem to be perfect and think they're a butthead. Was I really doing that to this Sam dude?

"You're right!" I blurted out in disgust that she was. I've never liked it when I'm blind of my own actions.

There was more silence while Tiffany struggled to hold back some words, phrases, and laughs.

She caved in, "You _like_ him!" It was sad at that moment. The only normal person I knew was gone now. She saw that I was starting to_ really_ get irritated and sighed towards me. "Tell me the truth. You can't tell me you don't like him at least a little, for a guy you haven't known for twenty-four hours.

"Well, I don't know. He's cute, I guess. But in science, he was like… stalking me. He kept looking in my direction and it bugged me off. He's just like a lot of guys, desperate."

"Did you ever think he might just have a little crush on you?"

"During the event of a normal crush, the dude shouldn't stalk the person he likes. The one with the crush normally doesn't stare, but tries to act cool and stuff," I explained, looking to the ceiling.

"Well if it's not a crush, then what is it?" Tiffany, the wise one who can always see beyond the surface of every situation did it again. She was right. But what if it isn't a crush? If that's true, then why is he staring at me?

I growled. It was a crush. Must have been, right?

I began to ponder on that thought but she stopped me. "Well don't make a big deal out of it. If it's a crush, it's probably just puppy love and that usually doesn't go much of anywhere."

"Oh, well thanks for giving me confidence!" We laughed together that familiar laugh, the laugh that I hadn't heard sense I left Burleigh. I didn't have too many laughs at Swanchester. I was picked on because I didn't have any good clothes or hair or anything and I couldn't do anything about it either. But I didn't care. I just wish that everyone else didn't.

Suddenly the closet door burst open and Carly was there with a wide grin. "Michelle is sleep walking!" She whispered loudly. Tiffany and I looked at each other and quickly got out to find Michelle in the room shoving Carly out of her imaginary way. As Tiffany and I tried to get out of the closet, Michelle was enjoying a beautiful dream about breakfast. "_Bread…. Butter…"_ she said. Then it looked as if she was picking up some type of sandwich and eating it.

She suddenly stopped, turned around and slammed poor Carly with the door, but Carly was laughing too much to have a typical reaction of pain and kept on a large smile. Brittany and Emily were out in the hallway as Michelle walked by them and ran into the couch in the living room. All five of us were either laughing or continuously saying "omg". This was an intense memory.

We found Michelle laying on the couch in an awkward and uncomfortable way. We stood there in silence and suspense as if we thought she was going to get up and do some other trick for us. Instead, she jerked up in shock, yelled something like "Wah!" and looked at us with wide eyes.

"Wha… how… the… what happened?" We all laughed at her reaction. I missed our sleepovers and was glad to be back, where I belonged.

That night, I had a dream. More like a nightmare, in fact, one of my worse ones. I was in a school, not Burleigh High but somewhere else. I was lost and ran from hallway to hallway, for some reason not trying to open doors. My mind was telling me they were locked if I ever thought about trying to open them.

I was continuously surrounded by gray lockers and dirty, white tiled floors. The windows were too bright to look at. Hallway after hallway, it was like a maze except I didn't know what I was looking for. An exit? Entrance? Something or someone?

I ran until I found myself in the gym and I knew where I was. There was only one gym that had horrible lights like those, Swanchester's high school. The lights were so old, they were tinted yellow. My eyes struggled to focus on my surroundings in the irritating shade.

The mood in the dream was odd, I felt afraid, scared, like I was now running from something. Suddenly, across the gym was a guy dressed in a black sweatshirt and dark blue jeans. His face was too well shaded to see anything. I didn't, or wasn't able to, recognize him but in the dream I knew I was in trouble. I had only opened my mouth when he started sprinting to me and I couldn't move. "Sam!" I screamed in such an agonizing way. "Sam!" I continued.

The way the man was running seemed so perfect, so fake, like from something in a video game. He seemed to be taking forever like he was running but not gaining any ground.

Someone grabbed my hand, and oddly, I didn't even flinch. Next to me was Sam, the guy I haven't known for twenty-four hours. He stood straight up like a tall stick and smiled at me like he was lost in his own world, like nothing could hurt him for the moment, like he was… in love? It was the first feeling or emotion that came to me, I guess. He didn't seem to be aware of the man that was running towards us.

"Hey Lu," he said in a hushed voice. It faintly echoed around the gym and for a while, the thought of the other guy in there with us had perished. Once it came back, though, there was a gunshot. I didn't feel any pain but I felt the sudden pound on my stomach.

I jerked a little while my body tried to recognize that I was safe, lying on the floor in my party pajamas with my friends next to me who were totally dozed off. Even though I was surrounded with some of my closest, oldest friends, I felt so alone and scared.

The effect of the dream was still upon me. I was paralyzed with fear. Whenever I had a nightmare, my reaction wasn't like most others. I didn't scream or thrust around in my sleep, jump up or get out of my bed. I would stay totally still as though someone was watching me and if I moved, they would see I was awake and kill me or something. Maybe it's just a phobia.

I frantically looked around the room, keeping my head still as much as possible. After about twenty minutes, I calmed down enough and sat up. Because of my protective instincts, I made sure everyone was there. I had my sleeping bag that was next to Brittany and Tiffany. Carly and Kaitlyn were sharing the bed, sleeping in opposite directions and Michelle was next to Tiffany. They were all silent, peaceful and safe.

I sat back down as I tried to look back at the dream. I tried to remember the emotions and feelings so that I could explain it to myself and figure it out like I always try to do with dreams. After about an hour, I decided that I was killed in the end of the dream. I sometimes look at dreams as signs and I was worried that at some point I was going to go back to Swanchester, it was my worst fear and I ignored that thought. I sadly tended to have dreams about someone killing me so I didn't think anything of it. And Sam was there. I couldn't figure out why but what stood out to me the most was the feeling I had in the dream when he held my hand. I felt protected, comforted, safe, happy… in the dream, I liked him.

Awake, lying there in the dark, I liked the guy I haven't known for twenty-four hours.

Sorry if there are any grammar or spelling mistakes, I didn't get much time to go over this but I will as soon as possible. :)


	5. Chapter 3: Lucy

**Lucy**

Wednesday that week was pretty boring until English. The class discovered that our English teacher, Mrs. Cyr, was indeed a middle school teacher last year. She had heard that some of the students thought she was treating us younger than we were. So, she told us that whenever she needed to be reminded, we can bring up the fact that we're in high school.

After she had given us our new, insignificant instructions, she told us to pair up with a random person in the class to share our lists with. Well, no one picked a random person. Most everyone paired up with one of their friends. Mrs. Cyr could tell but she just laughed. She didn't care.

Sam was in the back of the row next to mine. I was more towards the middle though. I sat there as I watched everyone gather with their friends and began to feel a little down. I would probably have a friend if I didn't move. I tried to imagine what it would be like to have a best friend again that I had classes with, where no matter what, we would always be together. I haven't had a real friend in such a long time; I actually forgot what it's like. When you don't have a best friend, you can't really talk to someone about the embarrassing ways of life. You begin to feel alone in your own little world where you feed off the lies of the world. You almost feel like a freak.

But Sam wasn't shy and once he noticed I knew no one else in the class. He came up from behind me. "Hey, random person."

_No, _I thought, _not him. Not after that dream._ I could feel the emotions from the dream at that moment and the blood in my cheeks turning hot. "I'm sorry, but you aren't a random person," I shot back. I had to do something to avoid talking to him. Crushing on guys is not my specialty. And crushing on a guy where you had a dream in which he was killed… that's just awkward.

He looked around the room sarcastically, pretending to look under desks and behind walls, telling me there was no one else to partner up with. His journey ended with his mysterious, dark eyes back on mine with a slight smile.

I sighed and finally replied, "Well hello, other random person," with such enthusiasm (Not really). He sat down in the empty desk behind me and I noticed him take out a perfectly clean, unused notebook, except for the first page. On it was a list written in the worst hand writing I've ever witnessed; his homework. I pulled out mine too. "I thought you said you weren't the school type?" I said, referring to him doing his homework.

"Yea, well, I don't _like_ school, but I do want a life so might as well not waste my time while I'm here." That was a very good and impressive answer. He must have been lying.

"Well, I'll start." I said. I sighed dramatically and he chuckled. It was hard getting past the memories of the dream. I'm not sure exactly what happened but I just know that in the dream, I was beyond worried about him. I don't even know this guy and I'm already dreaming about him? I've barely known him for twenty four hours! Is it possible that _I'm_ the sketch this time?

We started off with simple things like our favorite colors, shows, hobbies and more. His favorite color was green; mine was intervening green and purple. His favorite show was Family Guy (of course) and mine was America's Funniest Home Videos. And other than that, we had a few things in common. We both liked music, preferably rock or punk, we liked to draw and we both liked English, the class. Every time he laughed, and once I finally got past the dream, I couldn't help but smile. Something about that deep, smooth, enthused voice of his lightened up the mood. He seemed too good to be true, too nice, too hot, and just too perfect for someone like me. Even if I did like him, I had no chance. I'm sure there were many girls at his door step every day. After about five minutes, we knew quite a bit about each other and we were acting as if we had been friends forever.

"Okay, next, I'm a Christian," I said like it was nothing at all but to Sam, it looked as if it was a problem. He gave me some dumbfounded look so I gave him an irritating look. "Have a problem with that?"

His eyes went wide and knew that he did something wrong like he did when I accused him at the playground. "Oh! No, no! No, I didn't mean…" he tried to save himself. I continued to stare at him with the look of disapproval. "No, it's just, Christians can't do much in _our world_ these days, can they?"

I was about to rip his head off. There was this big hole of disappointment in my chest suddenly. Tiffany was right. It was just a little crush, it's not like it would go anywhere. So I thought I might as well be a butthead for a little while as I defend myself. "Oh, my, word! Why are people like that? I can be a Christian and have fun!" I freaked out.

He had this guilty look on his face and he seemed a bit scared, like I would beat the crap out of him or something. He thought right, but I sighed and went for the calm approach. "Look, Christians do have rules to follow but it still is possible to have a life and have fun. For example, yes, I can go to a movie. Yes, I can go to parties, as long as I'm careful," he calmed down and snickered at me, and I smiled back, "and yes I can have a life!"

"Ha, ha, okay, okay, I get it. I'm sorry for judging you like that".

"You should be". Okay, so things haven't gotten too out of control yet. "If you go to the church I go to, I would totally prove you wrong."

"Hmm…" he said looking up at the ceiling, "I will just have to check it out then, wont I?"

I rolled my eyes. "Your turn".

"Okay," he paused. "I'm part of a gang". He said with a serious yet playful face, like he was trying not to laugh.

"That's intense".

"I thought that as a Christian you would have ditched me by now." He admitted, sounding like that's what he was hoping for.

"You're judging me again," I smirked at him. "But be honest, seriously".

"Okay," he sighed. His smile slowly faded away. He was being serious for once. He began to fidget with his paper, folding it one way then the other so he could rip it clean. "Well, my brother and his friends got in a huge fight a while back, I was involved sadly too. But it didn't end well, and we still fight to this day. People call us 'gang wannabe's'," he quoted with his hands, "but we aren't, it just seems like it." The vibe in the room became different to me. I didn't notice anything around me except poor Sam who was ripping and folding his paper. I realized he was one of the people my friends told me about, one of the people who probably get in fights at this school.

"You're serious about this?" I said for reassurance.

"Kinda'," he said with an annoyed tone, probably because he was use to people not believing in him. That's what I assumed.

"Hey," I said attempting to get his attention, "if you ever need to talk," I put my hand on his desk. You could call it a Christian's "I care" move. But Sam didn't accept it and sat up, picked his paper up then lightly slammed it back on his desk to get the message out but not make a scene.

"Look, I don't need you to preach to me, 'kay?" he scolded me. My heart broke in two. Not because I had a little crush on him but because the way he offended me. When people give me grief based on my being a Christian, it hurts a lot.

I looked down at my shoes. I could have cried but I wasn't just going to sit there and let him through mud at me like that. I had to think about this twice. Doing it could be daring and would cause attention from the class. He might even hate me after or be afraid of me like most other guys I've done it to violently. Good.

I turned at him and pulled his hair black up with great force so that he had to, against his will, look in my direction and listen to me. Sadly, I was stunned by how soft to the touch his hair was. It made me a bit gentler with him. "What the…" he hissed loudly, shocked yet agitated.

"Shush." I interrupted. "All I was going to say is that if you needed to talk, that I would be here and I'm sure Julie would too."

He had a weird expression; he looked at me so seriously that I got distracted by facial features again. My eyes traced the irises of his dark, brown eyes that will mesmerize any girl instantly, including me. His skin was flawless, not one blemish to ruin his light colored skin that was now red in anger. His jaw was moving as he grinded his teeth together, making his face tense up and look stronger. But slowly his lips started to stretch into a random smile that he tried to keep hidden behind his agitation by biting his tongue and shaking his head slightly away from me.

Gosh, he was gorgeous. I'm turning into Michelle.

I sighed and let go of Sam's hair, disappointed I was pathetically falling for him over his looks and mysteriousness. I tried to regain my train of thought. "And I don't preach to anyone 'cause I don't know how to. Plus why would I want to preach to you if you compare me to everything because I'm a Christian!" Apparently I was talking a bit too loud and a couple people were looking at us. Gossip was written all over their faces.

"Jeez!" Sam said. "Heh, I guess you can have fun." I squinted and shook my head at him. What the heck was up with this guy? First he insults me, then I freak out, then he laughs. I gave him a bratty look. "What's your problem?"

"You're right, okay." He sighed again and looked around to see if there was anyone still watching us. There were still a few that I could tell were trying to keep an eye on us or listen to what we were saying without making it look like they were eavesdropping. Sam leaned towards me. "I've never known a Christian before. Well… I have. But they just assume I'm some horrible sinner and hate me, and then_ they_ judge me." He sat back in his seat once he proved his innocence.

I understood that. It's depressingly common for Christians to judge others. "I'm just as much of a sinner as you, I bet". I tried to cheer him up.

"Look, it will just take me a while to get use to being around someone like you. And I'm not trying to be offensive, just honest". There was a long pause because I didn't know what to say.

"…_it will just take me a while to get use to being around someone like you"._ Should I take that as a sign? Did he assume that we would be friends, good ones? Is that a good thing? Did he want to be friends? It seemed like it at this rate.

I _did _feel better because I understood where he was coming from and I didn't blame him. I was still a little mad, but I would get over it.

"Okay… I understand." I kept suspicious glance on him. "But what did you mean by 'I guess you can have fun'?"

He laughed at me. "Hurting people can be fun, right?" I couldn't help but smile at least a little.

"So," I continued awkwardly. "We both need to write down one more thing."

He brought his eye brows together. "What?"

"That we both have judgmental issues." I said as I began to write it down. He laughed that deep, entertaining laugh, loudly. He knew it was true.

After the 15 minutes, Mrs. Cry had us go back to our desks. Sam got up and smiled at me as he walked by then sat back down at his desk. Mrs. Cry got up in front of the class as everyone else found their seats. "So, did you all learn enough about each other?" The girls just nodded their heads or said yes while some of the perverted guys looked at the girls and said no. Mrs. Cyr laughed and took it as a yes, "Well good, because Madame Marston (a French teacher, in fact, mine) gave me an excellent idea! Whoever you worked with today is your new study-buddy!" She said with way too much excitement.

The class was silent at first then we all turned to each other, trying not to express how childish it sounded and not embarrass Mrs. Cyr. It took a while but finally, one of the guys said, "We're in high school Mrs. Cry!" The class thundered with laughter. I smiled brightly and turned towards Sam, he wasn't laughing but he was smiling, at me. I looked away quickly once I realized I started blushing and heard that perfect chuckle behind me.

But along with it came the painful memories of the dream again. I could clearly hear his echoes again that haunted me the rest of the day.


End file.
